My own brother said to me the other day, “I don’t need therapy. I don’t need someone who does not know me telling me how to solve my problems.” I asked him if he thinks that is how therapy works, and yes, he genuinely does believe that. Oh no! As I therapist for almost 30 years, I can assure you that we don’t know the solutions to your problems. There are far too many variables to consider with any problem for a therapist to know any answer for you. In fact, if you find a therapist who seems to think they know all your answers, run! However, with all of the years of training and practice therapists receive, me included, we do know the types of questions to ask to help you discover your own answers. We know questions friends or family would not think to ask. Furthermore, we are trained to discover patterns and themes from your stories over time that others would likely not catch. You should never hear a therapist say, “you should…” but you will likely hear them say something like, “I noticed that over the last few months your stories seem to include the theme of ‘not feeling like your voice is being heard’, or ‘feeling underappreciated.’ Did you notice that too?” We may follow up with an exploration of this behavior in all of your life domains, or by asking if you are familiar with assertive communication, and if not, would you want to hear more about it. This is just one example. I personally wish I had all the answers, both for myself and as a business model. I don’t. We don’t. We are amazing partners to clients in their journey to discovering their own answers. A therapist can even hold on to hope for you when you’ve lost yours, be an accountability partner when you need one, and/or be a consistent presence in your life when others have not. For more information about therapy or counseling services please watch the free video on the landing page of this website, or email consciouslivingcounselingla@gmail.com for more information.
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